#when. did this happen
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Went to a mantle geochemistry reading group for the first time, having skim read a paper on stable isotopes and their role in deconvolving mantle heterogeneity. Skim reading turned out to be a bad idea, since at this very first meeting of Liquidus (so named after the pub visits scheduled to occur after each meeting) only myself and four post docs were present. With such a small group, it is inevitable that one is noticed, as hard as I tried to make myself disappear and not exist (such, alas, is my luck). The others had a lot to say. A lot. I don't understand where this extraordinary excess of knowledge comes from in these postdocs (perhaps it is simply a deficit on my part) but they dissected, analysed and critiqued the paper within an inch of its life. Meanwhile this gal had nothing to say and no opinions to opine. In fact, my sum total contribution to the meeting was when, at the end, one of the post docs asked me "Do you have anything to add?" and I said "No."
I mean, it does not help that I am poorly socialised at the best of times but the fact that my capabilities for generating bullshit have disappeared without so much as a fucking send off is just!! terrible!! Also, isotopes: i've made a career out of avoiding isotopes (I have the same problems with heavy and light isotope behaviours as I do with right and left; there is a 50-50 chance of me getting things wrong) and it was all about isotopes. Also, I've sort of taken to not speaking when I have nothing of value to add and guess what? I have nothing at all to say.
#ok this is sort of unhinged#but I went to an event and got a bit very drunk#and the wine does things#like amplify the self hate. but we live ya know. gritting our teeth#but also: the dysfunction I just#FINE when completely alone MESS when in a social context#when. did this happen#PhDee#trainwreck edition
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funniest news blurb i've ever seen actually. "there was a plot to kill trump last weekend. no not that one. totally different one. we figured out about it beforehand though so we heightened security at the rally. yeah that rally. yeah the one where-- yeah. yeah that one."
#me#like how do you fuck up SO tremendously hsjdhdjhk#trump shooting#idk what to tag it if you guys have it blacklisted but hopefully that covers it#5k#when did THAT happen
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im already at the south downs cottage guys, catch up
#good omens#ineffable husbands#aziraphale#crowley#they're nb in the flavour of being lesbian gay men bc its such a lesbian move to pine for someone for a few thousands years#and literally not make a move#PLUS u know when they have sex it takes like 9hrs and if you wrote what they did down on paper it really wouldnt look like much#but they still had to take intensity breaks bc they kept getting overwhelmed and then just making out for an hour#thank u for coming to my ted talk#high amounts of gender of all types happening all the time with these two
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definitelynottober day 5 - heavy is the hunger
#definitelynottober#definitelynottober2024#goodtimeswithscar#goodtimeswithscar fanart#gtws fanart#hermitcraft#hermitcraft fanart#tw blood#gif#animation#continuing my yearly trend of 'why did i do an animation for a day prompt' fjfhdkfuh#this is what happens when i get indecisive about poses and angles#i think about the vex lore alot
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trans women are everywhere and are so eager to be seen and heard but only if they feel safe around you. if you hardly ever have trans women interacting with you, especially online, then consider there might be a reason for that and you should address it
#the same thing happens with black people#black people are everywhere! especially online! black gay and black trans people!#but when your community is suspiciously devoid of them then theres something wrong and you need to acknowledge it#even if its not intentional you need to think about how theres minority groups who do not feel safe around you at face value#this is why loud and outright support and solidarity is so important#black people and trans people and etc minority groups will assume you are unsafe unless you explicitly state otherwise#you can't just sit there and say 'well they didnt approach us so its not our fault for not including them!'#like did you TRY to get them to approach you??#cy texts
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quick itfs sketch page
#my art#jujutsu kaisen#jjk#yuji itadori#megumi fushiguro#itafushi#fushiita#jjk fanart#jujutsu kaisen fanart#yuuji#megumi#fr some reason it's rare fr me to b happy with monochrome pieces so i am combatting tht general dislike by making it itfs#harder 2 dislike smth when it's a bunch of sketches of my ship kissing#oh ya threw in some good ol Corner Angst also bc i ended up not wanting 2 draw a third kiss dsfhjshdsdfjg#doing this got me thinking about tht one itfs piece i did back in april#captioned smth smth 'im on an itafushi kick'#n how that was like. the piece that opened the floodgates n made me realize how actually insane i am abt them#before it was just a casual Yeah This Ship Is Cute ill draw for it when the mood strikes#then after doing tht draws i ws like wait a minute whats happening to me#now here i am 5 months later completely emotionally dependent on these 2 traumatized 15 year olds#anyway this sheet is kind of an homage 2 the other one :'> how far ive come. how far theyve come. they make me ill every waking hour
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Book 2 au: sparring sessions and short hair katara
They like to have sparring sessions in order to keep their bending skills sharp. They allow themselves to go all out and not hold back at all cause they know if anyone got hurt, Katara could just heal them
But anyways, wouldn't it be kinda funny if Zuko accidentally burned Katara's hair tho? Aofkqldkkajfjd
The "I think we can save the hairloops" line is from @linnoya-writes thank you for that!! :>>
#zutara#zuko#katara#atla#book 2 au#my art#i mentioned in my last book 2 au post that i wanted to include short hair katara into it and y'all were so supportive of it!! 😭😭😭#so this is how i think it would go#it would happen as katara is trying to evade one of zuko's fire balls#she manages to avoid it but since her hair is long it still caught on fire#she'd be pissed so she water whips the hell out of zuko#and then promptly forgets about it akfhkakdkakdj#even after the sparring session she still hasn't remembered cause 'oh no zuko's in pain i have to help him!'#it isn't until zuko even mentions it that she remembers#zuko thinks she's more calm than i thought she would be after burning her hair so he mentions it to her#little did he know katara just forgor aldjlakdkaljd#n e ways zuko does feel bad so she offers to help fix it up for her#i think after the haircut katara would find herself looking in mirrors when there are any around cause 'zuko thinks i'm beautiful?? really?#zuko doesn't know this tho and he thinks katara is till sad about the unwanted haircut so he keeps telling her that she looks beautiful#and katara just keeps losing it aldjlakdlald#in conclusion they are idiots your honor
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been replaying the Portal series I think this is where its heading
#i haven't drawn in like. half a month. which listen i know i don't post much here but i do draw a lot#i have another blog. but also sometimes i just don't post things. i draw for myself#just got burnt out from working on an animation final 😔#so anyway. eased myself back in with a silly comic about portal#my irl saw my shitty sketch and thought glados was painting chell which is very funny to me.#chelldos#but like. unrequited. glados is obsessed with chell. chell is not having a good time#portal#chell#GlaDOS#GlaD0S#my art#og post#1k#5k#10k#20k#30k#yuri#shipping#edit: i made this post almost a year ago and it haunts me. theres a typo. chell is out of character.#because i couldn't come up with a good reason for her to be there in the first place#and this was a shitty ms paint replicating drawing that i did just to get back into drawing#i didn't think it would gain much attention#i was Wrong#anyway someone in the comments said this is what happens when you speedrun thats an infintely better setup for the punchline#EDIT 2: ok i fixed it fuck you
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tsum events continue to be just the best
#art#twisted wonderland#twisted wonderland spoilers#tsumsted wonderland#a perfect happy ending to a tale as old as tsum#everyone just CLAMORING to get on malleus-tsum's dance card#how do you even dance with a tsum. like logistically#twst don't care twst gonna just be as ridiculous as possible and i love it#i did initially misinterpret the sound effect to be malleus-tsum (somehow) kissing malleus' hand when they started dancing#my disappointment when i went back and checked :(#it still happened in my head and in my heart
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Is she Lucy Westenra, or is she just a vessel for the writer's barely disguised fantasy of a women being punished for her promiscuity? Is she really"Bram Stoker's" Lucy Westenra: a naive, innocent 19 year old, with a cheery personality and a bright future ahead of her? Or has the writer instead just slapped her name on an OC that behaves nothing like her, and- with none of the grace or decorum that Lucy's tragically short story deserves- sexualized her slow and agonising death as much as possible, whilst very unsubtly doing their best to blame her for being murdered, so that we won't object to her being killed again later in an even more gruesome and sexual manner?
#every dracula adaptation gets every character wrong- but the way Lucy is treated in particular makes my blood boil#she's not stupid for being naive. she's not stupid for fixating on marriage. she's 19. A TEENAGER. she's allowed to be young#of course she doesn't have much life experience! that's why it's so tragic! when she dies we mourn the person she was meant to become#and regardless of however adaptations try to spin it; she did not want to be killed. she wasn't aware of dracula like the other characters#she didn't deliberately let dracula kill her. she didn't ask to be a vampire. she wasn't in love with dracula or anything like that#she died not understanding what was happening to her. she never lost her naivety. and that makes it even more tragic in my opinion#anyway thanks for coming to my ted talk#i think my old dracula hyperfixation is reigniting and i don't have the strength to stop it lmao#lucy westenra#dracula#bram stokers dracula#dracula daily#lit student screams into the void
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we were sitting on the floor and i was cutting out tiny pictures to make a collage for a friend's birthday. you were on your phone and you laughed about something, and i was still in love with you then, so i asked what had you giggling.
"sorry. i was just..." you took a moment and went back to texting. "i was telling someone about how you're afraid of the dark."
i'm afraid of the dark because something bad happened. "oh." i felt a little slinky of shame crawl down my throat.
you glanced up, and maybe it showed on my face, because you rolled your eyes and held the phone to the side casually so i could see the group chat. "what? was it a secret?"
i looked down to the scissors in my hand. "i just..." no, it's not a secret. it just felt like something private, something serious. saying why would you tell someone that just feels like an accusation. it's unfair. i honestly am not even ashamed of it, it's just a fact about my person that i don't usually share.
what a strange experience. is this a human thing or a generational thing? for our grandparents: did they need to worry about how quickly someone can just... share your personal information? again, i didn't even really have a true objection. what could i say? i want any person in my life to feel they can be honest with their friends. it's not like i said don't tell anyone this.
i cut out another letter to complete the rainbow happy birthday, started hunting for the exclamation mark. i heard you sigh dramatically.
"don't make a big deal about this," you said.
this entire conversation was a pattern for us, and this was when we got to my least favorite part of the pattern. i would get my feelings hurt in some oblique not-technically-terrible way, and then it would be making a big deal about something. you'd get frustrated for me for being soft, but i was born soft. you knew i was soft when you pierced me. it's one of the things that made controlling me so easy.
"i'm not," i felt my voice crack. the question came without my wanting. "why are you guys talking about me?" and why are you saying that thing? why not like - i'm telling them how you're generous and kind and pretty.
you let out this low, tragic groan. "oh my god." you tossed the phone away from your body. "there, see? i just won't talk to them if you don't like it."
the rest of the hour went the way it always went, between us: i said i don't actually mind if you talk to your friends but -, you found a way to call my minor expression of discomfort "being dramatic." you got upset that i had been offended. i ended up apologizing, even though i hadn't actually done anything.
afterwards, you picked up the phone again. after texting for a little bit, you snorted. "okay," you said, "but it is kind of funny you're afraid of the dark. i mean, when you think about it."
#spilled ink#writeblr#i'm trying to write about this really specific and wierd new experience#that i think is specific to the internet generation#where people you trust can just... say whatever??? and while most people are trustworthy#sometimes they'll just like... put ur shit out there????#and the thing is that sometimes it's GOOD - i want you to tell ppl if ur partner is being cruel!!!!!#i want u to be like ''hey is it normal if xyz happens'' ... but stuff like ''she's afraid of the dark''#PARTICULARLY when it's CLEARLY making fun of me....#what is the point of that.#this is huge and complicated and happens outside of romantic relationships too btw#like someone u thought of as a friend will be like . oh did u know she's scared of heights and it's like.#girl why are u fuckin doing that tho?#it's not a SECRET i just ...???????????????????????#and i think that gross feeling of like -- ''i can't REALLY be upset bc there's not a TRUE RULE about this....''#it's just not something talked about. bc it's so specific and yet so complex#bc how could i say like '' this is a violation of trust'' when it... technically I GUESS isn't????????????#idk maybe im just like super sensitive but please tell me in the comments/tags/etc if this is#something u have experienced (a trusted person like spreading ur shit) and if u were cool with it
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What if,,
#haven't been drawing a lot lately. ive just been spending time with family during holidays#but i make an exception for aus that comes and goes in my head#i have impulsesto make them when an idea latch on..#i do have a slight idea for what happens next but im not sure if im able to continue#im not sure if someone already did a crossover of these lol#euclidea#bill cipher#a sphere#flatlands#a square#gravity falls#scalene#euclid#my art
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It's truly wild to me how many people out there don't understand that the Star Wars prequels are a tragedy or how tragedies work.
Posts like "these are the Jedi failed movies" truly just make me shake my head. They're actually the "fascism wears a smile until it strikes you down and then it's too late" movies. They're the "the senate became corrupt and clapped in the face of genocide" movies. They're the "make people scared enough of war until they accept authoritarianism" movies. They're the "fear and possessiveness will tear you up on the inside" movies. The Jedi were the heroes of lore, people loved and looked up to them, looked to them for safety, and then too much got put on their shoulders on purpose by Palpatine, and also by a senate that didn't want to act (not you Padme and Bail and Mon, you're perfect). They were drafted and used and scapegoated, which is, you know, a tenet of the vast majority of authoritarian governments (Hitler and Stalin, for instance, might be on different ends of the political spectrum, but they sure both did scapegoat specific groups and commit mass murder, just differently).
When some people say "these movies are about the fall of the Jedi" what they mean is "the Jedi failed" but that's not what "the fall of the Jedi means." It means they were wiped the fuck OUT. Like, Jesus, in Rogue One Tarkin is talking about burning out the final MEMORY of the Jedi by blowing up the holy city in Jedha. Palpatine had to get rid of the Jedi because to get rid of the Jedi was to get rid of the final people standing in his way after he had already worn them out. His intention was not only to kill them, but to alter the galaxy's entire perception of them. To rip away hope. People are always looking for the Jedi to be Bad or nitpick their mistakes (because while other people are allowed to make mistakes, the Jedi never are). Palpatine made himself look like a benevolent grandpa who would keep everyone safe. And that, more than anything, is what gave him SO much power. He stole the narrative.
It's just like. Of course WE know what was going to happen! We know from watching the OT that the PT can only end in tragedy. But the characters don't know that! They don't have all the info! That's how a tragic story structure works. We see it coming and they can't.
Anyway. The Jedi are laser-sword wielding monks with psychic powers who just wanted to do what they could to help. The world would be better if more folks remembered that.
#Sorry the Acolyte discourse is wild#“Those Jedi went in there and slaughtered those witches” dude they did not#That's not what happened like in what fucken world#Like that's clearly NOT what the narrative itself is saying and yet#I knew this would happen when they made High Republic TV but#I hoped it wouldn't#The show has actually taken great care with the Jedi so far imo#Much like the THR books do#Pro Jedi#KCrabb rambles#Star Wars tag
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Skizz said he wanted to say something but wasn't sure and Grian just said "do it. Joel will bleep it out." He proceeded to swear twice, they all giggled and as said joel beeped it out. What has become of my pg youtubers 💔
#guess the build#lmao#grian#impulsesv#smallishbeans#jimmy solidarity#skizz#geminitay#omg my first 1k when did that happen
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corvidae
#my art#jujutsu kaisen#jjk#jjk fanart#jujutsu kaisen fanart#yuji itadori#itadori yuuji#blood/#yuuji#im not tagging this as spoilers idc sue me . iykyk but i dont think it's obvious enough at all 2 warrant the tag#idrk what this is sorry ive been having a hard time drawing n feeling inspired lately :'>>> so it goes#i find i tend to default to drawing birds when that happens ???#did it with gojo did it with shiro and now it's yuuji's turn ig#sometimes it's helpful to just . mess around with a whole bunch of brushes until something looks ok#and birds and feathers lean soooo well 2 playing around w brushes theyre very forgiving#flowers also kind of so i threw in some camellias bc i figured why not add More Red#i think they mean something that's probably relevant but i was more looking fr the shape of the petals#th rounded tops blend rly seamlessly with the way i rendered th feathers so i am like!!!! nice#just checked also apparently red camellias just mean love and devotion lmao should have guessed#'perishing with grace' also hm hm hm that's kind of wild with th crows#anyway i didn't put too much thought in2 this one so i won't talk fr ages about the symbolism it's all pretty much right there#anyway ty fr being patient with me im sorry draws have been slow :<#ill come out of it ill bounce back!
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